Saturday, December 22, 2007

Nerd Credentials

I believe that I am a nerd. Some would exclude me from the category simply because of some past titles I have held, for example, cheer captain. Actually that is the only one. Now I don't like to kowtow to the bigots, but to satisfy my narcissism I will exhibit some credentials that clearly define my nerdiness.
Number one is certainly the weakest point but it is that I want nerdiness, and as all nerds know desire is 49% of everything. The other 51% is reality.
When I was 10 years old I started a mimic mag of National Geographic called "Around the Globe" in which I removed magazine pictures from lesser articles and wrote better ones. One article, titled "Doggy-See, Doggy-Do", featured a seeing-eye dog who learned to drive his blind, elderly owners truck. Buddy was the first, and to the best of my knowledge still is, the only dog to be a valid licensed driver. There were two editions of "Around The Globe".
When I was 11 years old the Hughes grocery store near my house was bought out by the larger corporate Ralphs grocer. In my disdain for the switch I took myself and a small camera crew (my nine-year-old best friend Kelly) to the store to do a little live reporting on how the community members felt about it. (Just FYI the community members agreed that the new red sign was 'obtrusive' but felt that if the service remained up to par then they were okay with the switch. How fickle.)
And perhaps the number one qualification I have, and this is a coming out of sorts seeing as I think maybe two people know this about me: I invent superheros. Electro-woman, Firen, Englotech-- these are among the posse of heroes I bring to reality on paper bi-monthly.
So to you doubters, you haters, you dream-deniers: I may not read science fiction, but I do live it.

3 comments:

Kaity said...

if i could have a super power i would want to be best friends with every person past or present/fact or fiction. but if that was already taken then i would want to have complete statistical knowlege.

s.s. bazodi said...

I too was cheer cap-i-tan. Maybe we could get together and practice some stunts to a Gladys Knight re-re-re- REMIX!

Seriously... said...

hhahahaa. when I was 10 I started a fashion magazine for chimpanzees. I was (and still am?) obsessed with chimps. Not so much fashion.